Donald J. Trump took to Truth Social to announce on Sunday that Republicans plan to deploy a large “Election Integrity Army” to every single state for the 2026 midterms. "Be assured this election will be fair," he wrote. Trump is like the guy, let’s call him John Barron, OK?, who shows up to a poker game with his own deck in hand, a metal detector, and an assortment of dubious characters, then says, "Relax, everybody, the game's totally on the level this time."
This is the same man who spent years treating "fair elections" like an infectious diarrhea, who is now promising it'll be super fair as long as his poll watchers outnumber the voters in key spots. The "assured" part is doing a lot of heavy lifting there—like a mob boss saying, "Nice democracy you got here, it'd be a shame if something happened to it."
With Trump's poll numbers in the shitter, while doing nothing for the American people to rectify that, he's growing increasingly desperate. And then there are the redistricting wars between Democrats and Republicans, after he pulled the first punch.
"Palestinian Chuck Schumer is hiring Eric Holder, famous for handing guns to Mexican cartels under the Barack Hussein Obama administration, as part of a Democrat-led "Election Integrity Group" that will no doubt try to suppress Republican voters, and interfere in our Elections," he insisted. "Furthermore, Marc Elias, a terrible lawyer with a horrible track record, is also involved."
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